There is definitely anxiety. She does not want her mind impacted. So it's a scary thought about having more brain involvement. Irrespective of long term disease outcome. That's one reason she's been getting up early, so she can have at least a couple hours when she's feeling more herself, before the 9:00a.m. meds and the fast slide into loopiness. But she was pretty sad this morning.
We've also had to endure the switch to a different (mail order) pharmacy for her chemo drug, Temodar. Apparently it's pretty expensive so Premera Blue Cross cut a deal with two pharmacies and will only pay if it's filled through them. So I had to make the calls and give them all the information (twice, because the first person didn't record it all) and make sure I was authorized to give and get her medical information. Then I had to listen to their speil about their excellent service and availability in case of issues. Excuse me, it is not even close to the fantastic service we get from Katterman's Pharmacy. We have Beverley's cell and home number! Oh well, as long as they deliver it on time. Because I sure as heck don't want to pay for it directly - I think it's $10,000 a month. Cancer treatment is expensive. Let's hope it buys us some time.