No Cancer After 5

Once you have a metastatic cancer (Stage 4 - meaning it has spread and can only be eliminated by systemic treatment - i.e., whole body chemotherapy or biological therapy - not spot treatment such as surgical removal or radiation of a tumor), especially one like melanoma that does not have a reliable and relatively predictable treatment path to being NED (no evidence of disease), cancer does sort of become a 24x7, 7 day a week discussion.  It may be a discussion in your own head, it may be in your dreams, or it may be between the two of you.  As a cabana boy, it is constantly on my mind.  I mean, I worry about other things too, like the boys.  Life goes on, you still have to pay the bills and pick up dog poop.  But it's never away from your mind.  When I'm with Meagan it often becomes a topic - spoken or unspoken.  Even the amazing rituals we have adopted, like our matcha tea in the morning, as lovely as they are, have a root cause in the cancer.

Lavender Tattoo